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Contest: Win the book “Toddler 411”!



Those of you who have been faithfully reading Mommin’ It Up know that we LOVE the books Baby 411 and Toddler 411. We credit these clever tomes with our children’s survival up to this point. Well, now you can win your own copy of Toddler 411 from us here at Mommin’ It Up! “How?” you ask? It’s easy! Simply send an email to at least 5 of your friends telling them why you love Mommin’ It Up and asking them to read it! Include a link to our site and cc Jenny on the email (jenny@momminitup.com) and we will enter you in a drawing to win a brand spanking new copy if Toddler 411. We will accept entries today through Sunday, and the winner will be drawn and announced on Monday July 16th. Tell your friends about us and win!! Questions? Email Jenny. Here’s an example, just for fun:

To: All my friends
From: Me
CC: jenny@momminitup.com

“Dear friends,
Please check out my new favorite website, www.momminitup.com. It’s a blog about motherhood and it’s HILARIOUS! My favorite post is the one about _______. I read this blog every day and you should too! So please check it out and forward this to all your friends!

Love,
Me”

Allright, now quit reading us and go email your friends! (Then come back and read us some more!)

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X-Rated Arm Fat

This morning my three-year-old Joshua and I were sitting on the couch. I was doing my makeup and he was playing with the fat on my upper left arm. Just why was he doing that? I can only guess it is because I am and have always been his favorite toy, jungle gym, and entertainment center.

As I applied foundation, he squeezed some of my arm fat between his hands. “Look Mommy! Your arm looks like private parts!” Hmm, just the words every mother longs to hear her son say. I looked over to see what shape he could possibly be creating with my cellulite when he stopped doing it. Perhaps it was the look on my face that made him drop the fat, but I didn’t get a look. But somehow my jiggle reminded him of some type of nudey parts. Greeeeeaaaat. Here’s the ensuing conversation.

Joshua: I’m going to tell Pop! (My father-in-law, who we are going to see tonight.)
Me: No, honey, it’s not nice to talk about private parts. We only talk about them with Mommy or Daddy. (Translation:Please for the love of God do NOT tell my father-in-law that my arm looks like private parts, or anything else that might cause him to call children’s services.)

Joshua: Right. I can tell Mommy or Daddy. Or Pop.

Me: No, honey, NOT Pop.

Joshua: Ok.

I have to stop writing now, so I can go get my 3 lb. hand weights and get these vagina arms into a more arm-like shape!! Apparently blogging is not giving them the workout they need!

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Rewind….10/27/05 Baby-gina

To:Jenny
From:Emily
10/27/2005

Kate’s 18-month check-up was on Tuesday, and the doctor said she needed a little medicine on her girl parts because of the remains of her UTI. So we got the prescription filled yesterday, and when we got home Andy looked at the directions for the medicine. It came in a box with a tube of med, a 66-page booklet of directions, and a plunger. That’s right, a plunger, just like one that would come with, say, Monistat 7. So Andy’s reading the directions about how to fill the plunger and where to put it, and I was like, “That thing can NOT fit in there” as the color quickly drained from Andy’s face. So then he looked at the directions from the doctor, and it said just to put a little bit on the outside of her girl parts. Andy nearly passed out from relief. It was pretty humorous.

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To:Emily
From:Jenny

OH MY Gosh I was literally about to cry before you got to the part where you DIDN’T have to stick that thing up Kate’s baby-gina! Praise Jesus! A parent should just never have to do that!! I am also glad you discovered that before Andy hit the floor. In other toddler doctor’s appointment news, Joshua really “enjoyed” his flu shot today and also, as usual, getting his temp taken rectally. They are old-school at his dr’s office! I wanted to give Joshua some Motrin when we got home, to fend off any soreness from the vaccine, and he was by the front door, and he saw me take the Motrin off the mantle, and he goes “Oh! Medsin!” and booked it over to me and practically started climbing up my leg! So congrats to the makers of children’s Motrin on their flavoring! Apparently it’s exrtreeeeeemely tasty. I’ll have to watch and make sure he’s not faking any flu shot reaction symptoms just to get him so mo’ Mo’ (that’s the street name for Motrin, in case you didn’t know.)

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