Jeebus is Watching

If you’ve ever had the misfortune to drive on I-75 in the Monroe, Ohio area, you’ve certainly seen Jeebus, a 62-foot statue of what looks like Jesus carved out of butter and sinking in quicksand:

As a side note, at the very exit where Jeebus resides, you’ll find not one but two flea markets, a maximum security prison and another medium-security one, a strip club, a giant anatomically-correct horse, and a Hustler store. If you’re ever in the mood to do some people watching, have breakfast at the Waffle House right there. Trust me. Amy and I did it on Sunday.

But I digress.

Since we’re lucky enough to have this monstrosity fairly close to us, our kids have grown up knowing Big Butter Jesus, but it never fails to illicit an interesting response from Joshua and Kate, who termed in “The Big White Giant” when she was no more than two.

Saturday afternoon the kids and I were returning from seeing “Sesame Street Live” in Kentucky (no, we didn’t try to walk there), and for the better part of the trip, Kate and Sam were alternately chanting “Mommy is a goofball!” and “Mommy is a chicken!” They were cracking themselves up. I was pretending to be highly offended, which of course made them giggle even harder.

That is, until I pointed out that we were passing Touchdown Jesus.

Kate immediately smashed her face up against the window, and in her sweetest, most innocent voice said “Hello, Jesus. I reallllly love my mommy. She is realllly nice and I realllly love her!”

I burst out laughing and said “Wait, I thought I was a goofball and a chicken,” and she replied, “I know, but I didn’t want Jesus to hear me say that!”

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13 Replies to “Jeebus is Watching”

  1. Big Butter Jesus. Cracks me up!

    When we drove to Kentucky this year I told my husband we should find the huge honkin’ Jesus but he thought that might scare the kids. I bet if he knew there was a strip club there, we would have stopped. Kidding! LOL

  2. My husband and I call is “Touchdown Butter Jesus.” But, my 4-year-old son called it “butter football daddy” recently! The first time he said it, I DIED laughing. My husband has a nice Jesus beard going, but my DH’s complexion is much better than butter. (haha, I just made myself laugh!)

  3. But it was even more creepy when they were building the concrete monstrosity and only had rebar sticking out of his wrists. Like some weird interpretation on the crucifixion…

  4. How funny! I love the thought processes of kids. I showed your post to my mom, and her comment was ‘well, you know Jesus always was most at home when hanging out with the sinners’. lol!

  5. Betcha didn’t know that Jesus will be getting a facial this summer! Literally, they are redoing his face. Creepy! The cult that worships him apparently has nothing better to do with their money,.

  6. I’m agreeing that if the church has money to spare, feeding the poor would be a more appropriate use for it.

  7. The statue no longer exists. It was destroyed by fire after lightning struck it Monday night. The statue was made of fiberglass and Styrofoam, which made it susceptible to such a thing.

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