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WFMW: My Kids’ Lotion

It’s Works for Me Wednesday and it’s also true confessions time. What works for me is that the whole family uses my kids’ lotion. As a matter of fact, I use it more on myself than I do on them! We use Gerber Grins & Giggles, and I love the fact that they have so many different scents and are so affordable! You can usually get a 14 ounce bottle at Wal-Mart for around $2.50 and there are often coupons to be had at Gerber.com. I also love the coordinating Grins & Giggles hair & body wash and I’ve recently found it at Big Lots for $1.99! My favorite scents are Sweet Pea and Lavender, and my husband uses the Oatmeal almost every day and it smells great, but not so girly. The lotions are very moisturizing and the hair & body wash smells fantastic, and the smell stays in my kiddos’ hair for awhile. I love it! (Once again, the good folks at Gerber are not paying me for this, although I can be bought. How many times do I have to say that before I get some free stuff??) So if you love to smell like your clean baby all day, go get some G&G! It works for me!

For more great WFMW ideas, check out Rocks in My Dryer.

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Why ask why?

Intellectually I know that it’s a good thing my daughter is so inquisitive… but sometimes it still drives me nuts.

For example, every night when we’re reading a book before bed, she has to ask me about 29 questions about what’s happening on each and every page of the book before we can move on.

The worst part is that she knows what’s going on, she is just stalling, trying to make story time last as long as humanly possible. This gets on my every last nerve, because by this time, all I want to do is go to bed.

Go with me, if you will, to Kate’s room on any given night (a room, I might add, painted in “Bonita Berry,” otherwise known as the color of Dora’s shirt). Tonight we’re reading “Olivia,” one of our favorites.

This is how it goes.

Me: This is Olivia. She is good at lots of things.
Kate: What’s she doing, Mommy?
Me: She’s singing. She is very good at wearing people out. She even wears herself out.
Kate: Why is she laying down?
Me: Because she wore herself out. Olivia has a little brother named Ian. He is always copying.
Kate: Why is she all grown up?
Me: She’s not, she’s just wearing her mommy’s make-up.
Kate: Why is Ian always copying?
Me: Because he wants to be like Olivia. Sometimes Ian just won’t leave her alone, so Olivia has to be firm.
Kate: Why does she have to be firm?
Me: Because Ian won’t leave her alone. Olivia lives with her mother, her father, her brother, her dog, Perry, and Edwin the cat. (Here I point to each character because I already know she’s going to ask me which one is which, even though it is blatantly obvious).
Me: In the morning, after she gets up, and moves the cat…
Kate: Why does she move the cat?
Me: Because he’s in her way. And brushes her teeth, and combs her ears, and moves the cat,
Kate: Combs her ears! That’s silly.
Me: Olivia gets dressed. She has to try on everything.
Kate: Mommy, why is she wearing that dress?
Me: I don’t know!
Me: On sunny days… (at this point we usually get through a page or two, so I will spare you the details. I’m guessing half of you could recite it anyway). When her mother sees she’s had enough, they go home.
Kate: Why is she pink?
Me: That’s what happens if you don’t wear sunscreen.
Kate: I want to be pink.
Me: Then don’t wear sunscreen. On rainy days, Olivia likes to go the museum. She heads straight for her favorite painting.
Kate: Mommy, it’s PICTURE. Why isn’t Ian paying attention?
Me: Because he’s bored. Art museums are boring. (Ok, I don’t really say that.) Olivia looks at it for a long time. What could she be thinking?
Kate: Mommy, why is Ian so small?
Me: Because he’s far away. But there is one picture (I like to mess with her)…
Kate: It’s PAINTING.
Me: … that Olivia just doesn’t get. “I could do that in about five minutes,” she says to her mother. As soon as she gets home she gives it a try.
Kate: Let’s see if it looks the same (flipping back and forth). Nope, this one’s got red in it.
Me: Time out.
Kate: Why did she get time out?
Me: Because she painted on the walls. After a nice bath, and a nice dinner, it’s time for bed. But of course Olivia’s not at all sleepy… When they’re finished reading, Olivia’s mother gives her a kiss and says, “You know, you really wear me out. But I love you anyway.” And Olivia gives her a kiss back and says, “I love you anyway, too.”

We’re finally done. It’s just shy of midnight.

Ugh. If you think this is bad, you should see us trying to decide which of the 101 Dalmations is which. That is really fun.

And the best thing she’s learned from Olivia? Negotiating about how many books to read each night. Up until this book came along, she thought “Thou shall read only one book per night” was one of the Ten Commandments. Now we play “Let’s Make a Deal.”

Kate, you really wear me out. But I love you anyway.

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Let Him Eat Cake!

OR A Failed Trip to Target and Other Tragedies

Last week Tosh, our great friend and a trusted babysitter turned 18, and we were very excited about being invited to her party. So…the day of the party, the kids and I went to Target to get Tosh a present. I only had thirty minutes to shop before I needed to be at my grandma’s house for lunch, so I had a mapped-out shopping plan in place. After I looked for the intended present for about five minutes, Sophie grew fussy and Joshua announced he had to go potty. I raced the cart from mid-store up to the restrooms at warp speed, and got the kids out and into the restroom. Sophie was elated to get out of the cart, but not so thrilled when I sat her down on the floor (I know, eew!) to hold Joshua onto the potty. (After this experience, I made it a point to teach him to pee standing up. DUH. Add this to the “Things that would’ve been helpful to do yesterday” list.) Sophie screamed while Joshua peed, and by the time he was done she was hysterical. Despite some helpful comments from the woman in the stall next to us (for the record, I do NOT want to talk to you while you are peeing, or my kids are peeing, or I am peeing. So just sit there and pee and mind your beeswax, mmmkay???), I shelved the shopping trip and we headed to the car so I could nurse her. We would just have to go to Target after lunch at Grandma’s.

That would’ve worked out perfectly if I hadn’t taken Joshua potty right before we left Grandma’s. But I did take him, and I did a very poor job of positioning him on the potty. So instead of in the toilet, his pee-pee went all over the back of his shorts and onto the floor of my grandma’s bathroom. Of course, I had no extra clothes for him, so he had to ride home in just his (damp) underwear and t-shirt. And last time I checked, it wasn’t kosher to take your kid to Target in just his (recently peed on) skivvies. So…no Target!!! Waaah! And no present for Tosh, unless I wanted to sacrifice my kids’ naps that afternoon. Which I did not.

That night, Bobby, the kids and I went presentless to the party. Tosh didn’t care about the presentless part, and we had a great time. One of her cousins was there and had kids just Joshua and Sophie’s age, and the kids were playing while Tosh opened presents from the less shopping-challenged guests. Joshua was kind of playing and eating at the same time, and I was watching him like a hawk because he sometimes has a problem chewing his food well enough. Sure enough, he started to gag, and I yelled, “Bobby!” to get my husband’s attention, and motioned for him to hold his plate under Joshua in case he ralphed. Happily, it was a false alarm and the kids continued playing. Whew! Joshua and the other little guy continued jumping up and down while the babies played on the floor. Then out of the blue, with no gagging sounds whatsoever, Joshua projectile puked! It shot straight out and landed mostly on the floor, but some also splashed on Sophie’s head and hand!!! EEEEWWW!!!!

Joshua calmly surveyed his work, looked me in the face and said, “Can I still have birthday cake?”

The other mom grabbed her kiddos while Bobby and I scrambled to clean a) our daughter and b) our friend’s carpet, all the while trying to convince the other mom that Joshua did not have the plague, just an overactive gag reflex. Much to my embarrassment, this interrupted the present opening, but the guest of honor handled it really well. After all, it’s not really a party until someone pukes (on their sister), right??

And yes, I did let him have birthday cake.

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