I Only Bend at the Waist

Each summer, Bobby, the kids and I spend some at his family’s cabin in the woods about 45 minutes from our house. During this time, I don’t put a lot of effort into my appearance, because there is always a line for the bathroom. I mean, I make sure I’m clean and I use deodorant but I don’t really mess with makeup and my hair is always in a bandana or a ponytail. You know, I’m just there to relax with the fam. One evening when we were there last summer, I had to leave the family fun to go to a baby shower in town. When I returned, I was still dressed in my special occasion finery. “Wow, you look nice.” said Bobby’s sister Judy when she saw me. “Oh, thanks,” I responded, “this is Special Occasion Jenny. What you’ve seen this weekend is Family Vacation Jenny.” We both had a good laugh at this and I thought I was pretty clever. But then later I started thinking about it. It kind of weirded me out how different I can be in different situations. (Much like the different versions of Barbie!) I like to dress up, and be girlie and all that, but I also like to just slum around the house sometimes. So in the interest of true openness, I thought I’d share some of the different versions of my schizophrenic self with you all. Enjoy!

Wedding Day Jenny – Unfortunately, this was a limited edition Jenny produced in 2000 to celebrate her nuptials to Bobby. If you’re lucky, you can still find one on Ebay. Wedding Day Jenny features a fabulous up-do, three layer tulle veil, and Oleg Cassini satin wedding dress with train.
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Mommy Jenny – Since February 27, 2004, Mommy Jenny has been available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Although at some of these hours a day her capri pants and t-shirt are a little more wrinkled and stained that at other hours. Here’s hoping you catch her at a good time!
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Family Vacation Jenny – this Jenny is very relaxed and happy, and features a makeup-free face with a stylish bandana-ponytail hairdo. Family dolls are sold separately.
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Maternity Jenny – this is also a limited edition Jenny. It was available in late 2003 and early 2004 and again for most of 2006! She has now been discontinued, because she just got too clumsy, cranky, and uncomfortable. Also, the feet on the later-stage Maternity Jenny were known to blow up like balloons.
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Professional Jenny – Professional Jenny was available from 8:30 a.m. – 4:30 p.m. on Mondays and Wednesdays, and from 8:30 a.m. – 12:30 p.m. on Fridays. She came with a different outfit for each of the three days. Savvy collectors had them all! Professional Jenny was also discontinued in June 2007.
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Bridesmaid Jenny – This is also a limited edition Jenny, although it has had many, many runs. It is currently unavailable. The last production run seen here was in June 2005 and featured and Apple Red David’s Bridal bridesmaid’s dress and a crazy hairdo. The next limited edition will run in May 2008 when Megan & Andy get hitched. This Jenny will also feature a red dress by After Six but the hairstyle is yet to be determined!
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Beach Vacation Jenny – This Jenny just had a brief run in August 2006 so they are hard to find. She comes with sunglasses, beach chair, and lovely bathing ensemble. She also had a 1st edition in July 2005, and manufacturers are hoping to bring out a new Beach Vacation Jenny each year, however, they did not reach this goal in 2007.
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Well, that’s a look at some of the different Jenny’s!

But here’s the one you all get the biggest glimpse of. I call her:
Laughing at my Kid While I’m Trying to Write a Blog Jenny!
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Naked Grandmas and Cat Poop.

Jenny and I are pretty obsessed with the fun little website that tells us how many people are reading this blog every day (and thanks to both of you who are). One of the funnest most entertaining features of that site is reading about the search terms that lead people here.

It’s pretty amusing (and frightening) to see what people actually type into Google. Take a look.

8 weeks pregnant horrible fatigue impossible to work. Oops, maybe it was me that googled this.

A bird fell in my lap, what does that mean? I have no idea, but I’m pretty sure you’re not going to find the answer at Mommin’ It Up.

As an adult, have you ever had your temperature taken rectally in a doctor’s office. No, but thanks for asking.

Baby born in panera bread parking lot. It’s really surprising that this didn’t happen to Kate, what with all the cinnamon crunch bagels I was eating.

Baby throwing up stinky poop. Throwing up poop? That must be awful.

Bad reasons for a trampoline. I can’t think of any good reasons, actually.

Bobby go poop. I know that Jenny talks about her kids poop a lot, but I think she’s (fortunately) failed to enlighten us about her husband’s. That said, keep checking back.

Cat grunts when he poops. Cats can grunt?

Earbrows? I thought Kate made this word up!

Easier to breastfeed in hotslings or peanut shell. I don’t know what a hotsling is, but I think it would be rather hard to breastfeed in a peanut shell.

Girl breastfeeding cat. Ok you’re definitely not going to find that on this site, weirdo.

Girls that have peed in their pants on a car journey. Jenny! I told you not to post about that!

Grandma naked. YIKES. Please tell me that person didn’t search Google Images.

Hate being a mommy. If that phrase is leading people here, we need to re-evaluate our content.

How do i tell my son about erections. Jenny, would you like to take this one?

Jenny is a turd. hahahahahaha

My 7 year old drives me crazy. Fast forward to Mommin’ It Up in 2011…

My grandma had pantyhose on. I suppose that’s better than Naked Grandma from above.

“Pooping his pants” blog. Great, is this how we’re known?

Pumping while driving. My speciality.

Purple poop pumper. Huh?

Reasons to enter old ladies beauty contest. Um… well… sorry, I’ve got nothing.

Vagina arms. Apparently Joshua’s not the only one to see the resemblance.

What kind of pest scratch in the midnight. I don’t even know what that means.

And finally…

When i eat fiber, i poop. Isn’t that the idea?

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WFMW: Saving Money on Groceries

A few months ago, when my husband and I decided I would quit my job to be a stay-at-home-mom, he told me, “Your new job is to figure out how we can afford for you to stay home.” As one who’s always been a) a worrier about money and b) a lover of a bargain, I was eager to rise to this challenge! It also helps that I’m c) a bit of a control freak and this quest has helped me feel some control over our financial well-being also. So, today I thought I’d share with you some changes in my grocery-getting that have really helped our family save money and stay on-budget.

The first thing I’ve done is take advantage of a low-cost grocery program called Angel Food Ministries. Before I explain it, let me tell you that is seems too good to be true, but it is actually true and I will testify to that! Here’s the dealy-o: Angel Food Ministries has a monthly menu of foods that will feed a family of four for one week. The food is very good quality and is only $25 for one unit (you can order as many units as you would like). You place your order and pick it up once a month at a participating local church. Here’s what I ordered and will be picking up on Saturday, October 27th:

(4) 5 oz. Ribeye Steaks
(1) 3 lbs. Breaded Frying Chicken
(1) 2 lbs. Salisbury Steak Entrée w/ Gravy
(1) 24.5 oz. Supreme Pizza
(1) 2 lb. Chicken Chunks
(1) 24 oz. Pork Roast
(1) 16 oz. Chicken Breast Fajitas
(1) 12 ct. Corn Tortilla
(1) 15 oz. Pork & Beans
(1) 16 oz. Fresh Carrots
(1) 24 oz. Homestyle Hashbrowns
(1) 16 oz. Corn
(1) 16 oz. Bean Soup Mix
(1) 5.5 oz. Pancake Mix
(1) 7.5 oz. Mac & Cheese
(1) 7 oz. Lasagna Dinner
(1) Dessert Item

Yes, my friends, I am getting all that food for $25! The menu is different every month and they also offer a number of specials that you can purchase in addition to your regular order. The specials are such a great deal that we actually bought a freezer for our basement just so we can order additional specials if we like more than one! Here are this month’s specials:

OCTOBER SPECIAL #1
Meat Combo Box $18.00
4 8-oz T- Bones
2 lb. Ribeye Roast

OCTOBER SPECIAL #2
Strip Steak Special $18.00
4 8-oz. K.C. Strip Steaks
4 8-oz. New York Strip Steaks

OCTOBER SPECIAL #3
Family Convenience Meal
Special from Golden Cuisine $18.00
Five Delicious Individual Dinner Entrees with 2 sides per meal:
o Cheese Manicotti
o Macaroni & Beef
o Beef Pattie & Gravy
o Chicken & Noodle
o Chicken Breast & Mushroom Sauce
Includes five breads, five milks, ten margarine cups, and five desserts

Angel Food Ministries has been a real blessing to my family. Go to their website to see if it is available in your area! I strongly suggest you try it, you literally have almost nothing to lose!

The other way I save my family money on groceries is shopping at everyone’s favorite close-out store, Big Lots. I shop there for all our non-perishable grocery items like canned vegetables, soups, spaghetti, spaghetti sauce, mac & cheese, olive oil, breakfast cereal, oatmeal, etc. I also often find baby food there which is great. In addition to food items, I also save a lot of money buying household items at Big Lots like dishwashing detergent, dish soap, laundry detergent, fabric softener, and household cleaners. I usually make a couple of trips a month to Big Lots and if I see a really great deal, I buy it (often more than one of it) whether I need it at that moment or not, as long as I have the money and its something we’ll need eventually. I still shop at the big local grocery store for fresh produce but that’s about it!

All right, so now you all know what a cheapskate I am, but what can I say? I’ve been gainfully unemployed for over five months now and we’re not broke, so it works for me!

For more great Works for Me Wednesday tips, head over to Rocks in My Dryer.

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