Two nights ago, weary before bed, I said to my husband, “I think we should pay someone to come over here and talk to Joshua about Minecraft because I can’t stand to hear about it anymore. I’m serious. I cannot TAKE IT anymore. This is something I would pay money for.”
Bobby looked at me and with all sincerity said, “That’s a great idea.”
BECAUSE OH MY GOSH WE ARE BOTH SO SICK OF MINECRAFT.
Every time Joshua starts talking about Minecraft, or God forbid, WANTS ME TO LOOK AT THE SCREEN WHILE HE’S PLAYING (shudder), I tense up as if prepared for battle. I have to conjure up a mental happy place to go to to survive the ensuing minutes. Zombies, sheep, square ducks, swords, and lots of names I don’t understand (sounds like: hair-o-brine, no I DON’T want to know what the correct word is. Don’t. Want. To. Know.) and all the Minecraft stories are long, people, they’re LONG. So I have to stay rooted to one spot for entire ETERNITIES, people, listening to gobbledygook when I have SO MUCH TO DO.
Joshua’s so obsessed with Minecraft that he has started making Minecraft videos for KidzVuz. Like this one. I mean, he’s cute and all…but it’s just a video of him playing Minecraft. And there are like FIVE MORE that he’s done on my iPad that I haven’t had time to upload them yet. I mean we are probably going on 30 minutes of Minecraft videos here.
One of the reasons I can hardly wait for school to start is that at school, Joshua can talk to his FRIENDS about Minecraft and hopefully get it out of his system some. And then maybe, just maybe, when he gets home, he will just PLAY it…and not show it to me. A girl can dream, right? Dream that someday, she’ll live in a world where she doesn’t have to watch her son’s square doppelgänger climb all 567 steps on the giant high dive he constructed in his square pixelated dreamworld and then go shear some square sheep.
I dream BIG, people.
So, who wants to come over and talk to Joshua about Minecraft for real American dollars? Submit your resumes in the comments. I figured I’d ask you guys before I just hired some creeper off of Craigslist. I mean like REAL creeper, not Minecraft Creeper. Although they may be one and the same.
(P.S. this post was written with a 3-year-old on my lap. You may applaud now.)
Oh cousin, you make me laugh.
Can you just take Will off my hands for a while? He does the same thing, and watches the dumb videos people post of themselves playing Minecraft. I might just explode if I have to look at another cube toilet he made. Glad it’s not just us, though. Dan and I were fearing his obsession might lead to a friendless existence- but now I know he’ll have Joshua.
Thirty-five years ago it was baseball stats that I listened to incessantly. But now I remember those days fondly.
I can relate!!! I have TWO kids who feel the need to tell me about Minecraft all day. They also fight about Minecraft, dream about Minecraft, and even at times break down and cry because their Minecraft wrold has been destroyed by lava or floods. I don’t get the appeal of this game and I am a former gamer. I just really do not get it.
The stupidest thing I ever did was allow computer/video games in my home. Hate them!!
I’m SOOOO with you!! How about this?! I’ll let MY kids Skype with YOUR kids and talk about Minecraft for FREE!! Then we both win, right!?!
Ask him if he knows who Stampy Longnose is. Or Captain Sparkles. I’ve been acquainted with both, many times!
My husband loves it and will play with X…problem is, he travels a lot during the month. My trick has been to invite little friends over so they can either play or talk about it — even at the pool they talk about it! Every generation has its thing, you know? One part of Minecraft I actually adore is that both boys and girls seem to equally like it and play it. It’s a good gender unification tool that way. I don’t remember having anything like that when I was in fourth grade — Super Mario Brothers, maybe?
He is a big fan of Stampy. I think that’s the only one my husband has allowed him to watch (because you know I am not touching that with a 10-foot pole!)
We have had plenty of minecraft playdates but since I can’t do that every day…I am REALLY looking forward to SCHOOL to take this off my plate. Lunch and recess can be all minecraft gab sessions and maybe he will get it out of his system! I hope!