‘Twas the Night Before My Caesarean

I wrote this one year ago tonight on my old blog. It is very much just a “ramble”, but I thought you might like to hear the crazy thoughts of a woman on the cusp of giving birth!

Well ladies and germs, the moment you’ve all been waiting for is almost here! Ok, mostly it’s the moment I’VE been waiting for, but anyhoo, in about 10.5 hours I’m going to have a cesarean section and deliver my baby girl, Sophia Diane. I….CAN’T….WAIT! Mostly because I am sooo excited to meet my baby and know that she’s ok, but also because I’m preeeettttty darn jazzed about being UN-pregnant! Because let’s face it, the last trimester kind of sucks, and the last 4 weeks or so REALLY suck. Big time. And even though it means getting a ginormous hole cut in my belly, it really is a small price to pay for a miracle isn’t it?? After all, they DO compensate for cutting the hole in your belly by giving you both a baby AND a morphine drip. Woohoo!

So now my house is quiet. Joshua has been farmed off to my brother and sister-in-law’s to spend the night with his cousins or “the Dudes” as he calls them. He was realllly excited about that. Poor kid has absolutely NO CLUE how hard his world is gonna be rocked. I tried to spoil him today by letting him watch lots of tv, cuddling with him, giving him m&m’s and making his favorite meal (Kraft Mac & Cheese EXTRA CREAMY – the boy has tatste!) I was pretty sad when Bobby & I dropped him off at my bro’s house, cause we’re not really going to spend much time with him in the next few days, and I will miss him. And of course I am nervous about how he will react having to share me with Sophie, cause he is a mommy’s boy for sure. But I am reallllly excited to see how he reacts when he first meets her in the hospital! I am not expecting too much, but I am anxious to see his reaction. He picked out a toy to give her and she also has a present to give him. A peace offering, if you will!

On my last night as a prego, I took a shower (because I have to get up at 4 a.m. tomorrow and I am NOT showering then! But who knows when I will next shower? Friday at the earliest. Yikes.) and I attempted something totally crazy, which is, to shave my legs at 39 wks pregnant. What was I thinking?? I haven’t done that deed for at least two weeks but something got into me and I thought I should. So I did. And it was all going swimmingly, I made it through my left leg with no troubles, but then I cut the CRAP out of my right leg about 2 inches above my ankle with all three vibrating blades of my Venus Vibrance razor. The cut looks like an advertisement for adidas, the brand with three stripes. And it bled like craaaazy (cause you double your blood volume when pregnant. That’s pregnancy fun fact #427.) It took me about 15 minutes to get it to stop, and since I already gave the hospital 4 vials of blood today, and God knows how much I’ll be giving up tomorrow, I was really anxious to not lose any more. Yee-uck! So anyways, next time, if there is a next time, I think I’ll just use some Nair a few days in advance. Muuuuch safer.

Reason # 738 why I am sooo happy I’m about to be UN-pregnant, is that my feet are fricking KILLING me. All my shoes, even my boring old lady Lands End shoes I wear to mom around in, were painful to wear, but going barefoot is much worse. After I get out of the shower my feet hurt SOOO bad just from standing barefoot for 10 mins. It’s ridiculous! So on Monday my mom bought me some of those ugly plastic clogs with holes in them that everyone wears, and they are my new favorite thing!! And these are the cheap Meijer version. I wonder what a nice pricey pair feels like. They’ve really helped me out a lot, and I can wear them IN THE SHOWER! Hopefully I won’t have to soon, but they really have been a godsend. So tonight after my shower, after I got the hemorrhaging stopped on my leg, I got dressed and did my “ow my feet hurt so bad I might die” routine, which is rub them with “Dr. Scholl’s for her” peppermint lotion (sorry dudes, I guess Dr. Scholl must be a chick or a really insensitive man, cause I didn’t see no male version of said lotion at the store) which is my second favorite thing after the ugly plastic shoes. I slather my poor feetsies with more lotion than is necessary, then put on my socks and my ugly shoes and put my feet up on some pillows and….ahhhh. Very nice indeed. And much easier to do without a 2 yr old climbing all over me!

So now I’m just maxing and relaxing. I know I won’t be able to sleep tonight, which makes getting up at 4 am very convenient. Baby’s room is ready, and it is sooo beautiful, her daddy did an awesome job! Our bags are packed, the house is clean, our laundry’s done, all Joshua’s clothes are clean and I even washed his bedding tonight so he can come home to a nice clean bed. This nesting really cannot be stopped!! Except for by childbirth of course. So now all we need is our baby!! And Mommy couldn’t be happier that tomorrow’s the day she’ll be here!! We really appreciate your prayers that Sophia will be just perfect & healthy, just like her brother, and that my recovery will be good & fast & much better than last time.

See you on the postpartum side!!

(Please see the post below this one for pics of Sophie’s PARTY!!)

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My Little Attachment Parenting Activists

Some of my blogging buddies practice Attachment Parenting, and I think that’s great. I don’t personally practice it, and I don’t even think I knew what it was when Joshua was born. It involves, among other things, co-sleeping, extended breastfeeding, and stay-at-home-parenting. If you want to learn about it from someone who actually knows what she’s talking about, check out Adventures in Babywearing or the Crunchy Domestic Goddess.

So, like I said, I don’t practice Attachment Parenting. But my children seem to be advocates for said lifestyle. I am a stay-at-home-mom, and I breastfed Joshua until he was 13 months old, but I’ve never co-slept (except a couple nights on vacation with Sophie this summer because she was up every hour!) mainly because a) I am a very light sleeper and have some as-yet-undiagnosed sleeping problems and b) my hubby is a very heavy sleeper and I’m afraid he’d definitely and unknowingly squish a baby by rolling on it. However, at the age of three, Joshua has decided he’d like to co-sleep with me (not Daddy). He’s had two different phases where we’ve had a hard time getting him to go to bed in his bed without a fight. He’s just coming out of one of those phases, but even though he’s going to bed fine, he still manages to wander into our bedroom somewhere between three and four a.m. several nights a week. Once he’s there, I pull him into bed with us because I am too tired to do otherwise. He whines and fusses about Daddy being in the bed until I wake my husband up out of exhaustion and frustration and he splits. Then I pray Joshua is tired enough to go back to sleep without wallowing all over me, so that I might also get some rest.

And that’s just Joshua.

Sophia, at ten-and-a-half months, is very attached to me. I didn’t have to make any special efforts there. She wants to be on me all the time. She is constantly climbing up my leg – my husband just shakes his head in wonder. “She sure loves her mama,” he says. Understatement of the year! I really should’ve just bought a nice sling months ago so I could just wear her 24/7. It would be much more convenient. Then I wouldn’t have to pry her off my leg all the time so I could walk. The other night I was trying to eat dinner and she was standing at my side, pulled up on me, rubbing her face all over my lap. Then Joshua, who was grumpy, climbed in my lap as well. Neither wanted their Daddy, even though they generally love him a lot. I guess this should make me feel like every woman or something but it generally just makes me claustrophobic (and hungry)!

Sophia is also going to be an AP advocate on the nursing front. She still looooves to nurse. I planned to nurse her about 13 or 14 months but I am pretty sure I won’t be able to wean her until she’s about six. She is very fond of rubbing her face into my chest or licking my shirt when she wants to nurse. She’s very subtle, that one. I do love nursing her, I just hope I won’t have to finally put my foot down and wean her so that she can go to kindergarten.

If I had it to do over again, maybe I’d go back in time and practice AP, because honestly, at this point, I’m not sure I have a choice anymore!

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Adventures in the Vietnam Countryside

Emily and I are please to be hosting our FIRST guest blogger – our friend Emilie! (Don’t get confused, one is spelled with an “ie” and one with a “y”. It’s not so hard!) We met Emilie six years ago when we all worked together. Emilie is currently in Vietnam, having just adopted a Vietnamese baby girl she named Ellie. They are waiting to get Ellie’s passport and all that read tape-y stuff done so they can get HOME! We wanted to share this post with you from Emilie’s own private blog. It is the tale of the day she finally got to meet her daughter, her first child, and the final stop on her journey to become a MOM. It was originally posted on her blog on Tuesday, September 11, 2007. We hope you’ll love her story as much as we did!
Take it away, Emilie!
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You would not BELIEVE the day we had yesterday. I would have posted sooner — I knew people were waiting for photos and news that Ellie was officially mine. But by the time we got back last night, all I wanted was to go to bed. Luckily, Ellie wanted to go to bed, too. 🙂

We left the hotel at 8:15 a.m. for what was supposed to be a two-and-a-half-hour trip out to the rural province where the orphanage is located. We figured we’d be at the orphanage by 11 at the latest, spend a couple of hours there, and then head into Viet Tri (the province capital) for the giving and receiving ceremony. We were supposed to be there at 2, do our thing, and then be back in Hanoi in time for dinner. Riiiiiiight.

We got stuck in traffic in Hanoi and didn’t even get out of town til nearly 9:30. As I’ve said, there are no traffic laws here, so when there’s a back-up, there’s nothing to bring an end to it. The drivers here know this, of course, so they do everything they can to get around the traffic jam, rather than just waiting patiently for it to work itself out. Our bus driver decided the best way around the mess was to do a U-turn in the middle of a four-lane street, manuever his way the wrong direction through traffic, backtrack over all the ground we had covered, pass the hotel AGAIN, and take a different route out of town. By the time we left Hanoi, we had been in the bus more than an hour and had covered about a mile.

We headed out into the countryside, and passed Ho Chi Minh’s mausoleum on the way out of town. The locals call him Uncle Ho. There’s a joke in there somewhere, but I’m going to stay away from it.

You don’t have to get very far out of Hanoi to see the poverty get exponentially worse. At first we were glued to the view out the bus windows — we couldn’t believe people lived this way. But after several hours of it, I hate to say it, we were sort of immune to it. You can only take in so much.

I lost count of all the cows we saw in the road, all the ox carts we passed, and all the motorcyclists we nearly killed. We also saw several water buffalo and some cebu — if you’re a Veggie Tales fan, you’ll know why that’s funny.

We drove and drove and drove. And drove and drove and drove. And drove. And drove and drove. And drove. The two-and-a-half-hour trip was going on four hours by this time. We finally arrived around 1 p.m., only to find that the road to the orphanage had been washed out by a rain storm the night before.

But have I mentioned that we had to go to the bathroom on the way? Needless to say there are no rest areas or truck stops in rural Vietnam — there aren’t even any real roads once you get outside the city. So we stopped at what I think was a gas station, which had what I think were supposed to be restrooms. Only the restrooms provided neither rest nor rooms — they just provided holes in the ground, over which one squats and . . . well, you get the picture. It was an experience I’m not eager to repeat anytime soon.

But I digress. We arrived at the entrance to the orphanage, and instead of the gravel road we were expecting, we found a washed-out mud hole. Our bus couldn’t begin to navigate such a mess, so our agency representative called the orphanage (yes, we had cell phone service in the absolute middle of Southeast Asian Nowhere. I have no idea how or why) and asked them to send their jeep down to get us. They informed us that the jeep could not navigate the mess, either. So we were stuck. Our only choices were to have the orphanage workers bring the babies out to us on the ever-present motorbikes, or walk up the road in ankle-deep mud for a half-mile or so.

We opted for the ankle-deep mud. We wanted to see where our kids had been living, we wanted to meet the caregivers, and we wanted to give the other kids the gifts we had brought. Oh, yeah, did I mention we were delivering four TVs? Our group had chipped in to buy something for the orphanage, and the gift consisted of four flat-screen TVs — one each for the older boys’ room and the older girls’ room, and two for the common areas. The TVs were stacked in the back of the bus, and they had to get up the orphanage somehow. We also had two full suitcases, numerous bags and packages, and all our diaper bags, etc.

So off we went up the road and through the mud. It sounds happy, like “over the river and through the woods.” Believe me when I say it was NOT happy. But I’d do it again 100 times if that’s what it took to get to Ellie. We got part of the way up the road and were met by orphanage staff on motorbikes — they loaded us up and took us the rest of the way up to the orphanage. I and several others were wearing dresses — riding a motorcycle was not on our agenda for the day. Some of the other riders took our bags and packages — you’d be surprised what they can balance on the back of a bike — and some workers actually walked all the way out to the bus and carried the TVs back. We were quite a parade.

We arrived at the orphanage, hosed our feet off out in the courtyard, and went in to meet our children. We didn’t know it when we arrived, but our children were the first ever to be adopted from this particular orphanage. The workers were new to the whole process — they had never before seen a bunch of foreigners come in and walk off with their kids. They clearly didn’t understand what was going on, and were quite upset by the whole thing. On top of it, the facility also holds several elderly people, who understood even less about what was going on than the workers did. When we approached the building, the older folks just started handing us babies — they didn’t understand that we were there to pick up specific babies that had been assigned to us. They just thought we were there to pick out the cutest ones for ourselves, and they all wanted us to take the ones they were holding.

We finally made it to the room where our kids were, and I finally got to meet Ellie! She’s beautiful, and has done amazingly well so far, considering that I’m a total stranger. She slept through the night last night — 9:30 p.m. to 5 a.m. — and went to bed tonight at 6:30. I thought she was just going to take a short nap, but she’s been out for nearly three hours now. Of course, we may be up in the middle of the night playing for a few hours, but that’s okay. 🙂

We hiked back out through the mud, and were again taken part of the way on motorbikes. Ellie seemed to enjoy her first ride, but I was less sure of myself, trying to balance a baby on the back of a bike.

At the foot of the mud pit, we hosed our feet off again in the barnyard of a local family who were kind enough to offer us their limited water supply. Remind me to show you the pictures I took of the pig, who was watching us all with skepticism.

We went back into Viet Tri for the Giving and Receiving ceremony, or the G&R, which some of my traveling companions pointed out stands for Guns ‘n’ Roses. That took an hour or so — it’s the official end of the Vietnamese adoption process. As far as they’re concerned, she’s all mine now. None of us looked much like we belonged at an official ceremony — mud, sweat and jet lag had combined to make us a pretty bedraggled lot. But I’ve never seen a happier bunch.

The babies did really well on the ride home — better than the parents, probably, who had had ENOUGH of the bus by then. We made it back to our room around 9 and were in bed by 9:30.

Today we applied for the babies’ passports, and with any luck will have our first of two appointments with the U.S. Embassy later this week. Next week includes a medical exam and the second embassy appointment, as well as getting Ellie’s visa. Then we’re free to come home! Can’t wait to see you all and introduce you to my daughter!

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