Last week, another video spread like wildfire throughout social media. The video, titled “The Most Amazing Mother Son Wedding Dance EVER!!!!,” has nearly a million views.
If you haven’t seen it (and for some strange reason want to), here you go.
But here’s the thing.
Mother/Son wedding dances aren’t supposed to be amazing. They aren’t supposed to go viral. They aren’t supposed to be choreographed! They aren’t supposed to upstage the bride.
And for the love of all that is holy, they are not supposed to send a subliminal message from mother-in-law to hew newly-minted daughter-in-law with the songs “I Want You Back” and “Can’t Touch This.”
I’ll let you all ponder that one for a minute.
I just think the whole thing is wildly inappropriate, and I wish for the bride’s sake it had taken place before she had said her vows, so she knew exactly what she was getting herself into.
Listen, I am the mother of a son whom I love more than life itself. The bond between a boy and his mom? I get it. But, much like the promises I’ve made to Kate about not being an evil shrew when she picks out her wedding dress (and yes, she and I watch way too much “Say Yes to the Dress”), I am 100% confident in saying that that is something I will not do if and when Sam gets married. I just cannot conceive of how this woman thought that making her son’s wedding reception all about her was a good idea.
Narcissism with a dose of Oedipus complex thrown in for kicks. Gotta love it.
Don’t believe me? Check out this quote from the Daily Mail:
The video has now been viewed almost 800,000 and Kathy Bunker says she made a commitment to a producer from Ellen that she and her son would appear on the show.
I’m betting her son and his wife will make a commitment to appear on Divorce Court.
Right there with you Em!
Went to a wedding once where the mother and son did a very traditional dance–but the song was “The Dance” by Garth Brooks. I found the lyrics VERY inappropriate and sure enough, the marriage didn’t last.
Gross. But probably a better choice than “That Summer.”
I’m sorry, but i disagree. I do see the possible creepy side of this video. However, more so, I see the silly, meant to be a funny joke side of it too. Their choices of songs were, in my opinion, probably chosen because they’re energetic, the actual lyrics weren’t even really played, except for the “cant touch this” where at that point they broke out in crazy funny dance moves. The moves weren’t sexual or suggestive in any way and the bride seemed to think it was funny as well. I have a son, and while i definitely can’t see myself doing this with him at his wedding, I also don’t see any reason to criticize them for it and, really, who are we to judge anyway!?
Lets add in the fact that the routine would have taken lots of practice time with his mother, time that should have been spent, oh, i don’t know, PLANNING the actual wedding to his WIFE! Ridiculous.
Thank you Emily! My thoughts exactly.
Hmm well…my thoughts are: If I KNEW these people, I might have enjoyed it. I have no idea why 1 million complete strangers would want to watch this, though. That was a really long three minutes. As for the psychology, if my son ASKED me to do it, might. But there is no way that should’ve been Mom’s idea and let’s hope it wasn’t!
Huh. I didn’t think about all that, but I have to say…valid points! Also, in reference to one of your replies…That Summer is the grossest. Ever.
So funny Emily, and I couldn’t agree more. The key word in this post is narcissism. This was about “surprising” the guests (who let’s face it, probably didn’t care). You know what would be surprising? If the couple just slow-danced to a slow song. It’s now fashionable to over-indulge in every detail of every life event. Having a baby use to be an event. Now announcing the pregnancy is it’s own event, the “gender reveal” is it’s own event. It’s exhausting. If you’re not an over-the-top person by nature, Pinterest will be happy to help you out with ideas on how to keep the special moments of your life ultra-competitive and public…just as they should be. I find it a little sad that people feel the need to go to such lengths to out-do each other…or merely keep up with the trends. I hope my kids can manage to learn that there is value in sacred moments, and to put that value ahead of the pressure to put on a public show that gets 8 bazillion views. Having said that, my son is a dancer…and growing up in this new age of accepted narcissism, he will probably ask me to do the “worm” with him at his wedding…and I’ll be 60…but if that’s what he wants, I will die trying…and when I do die trying, that tragic video will go viral. 🙂
Thank you for saying this. So many days I hate social media for these reasons.
And the “gender reveal” thing has gone nuts lately! There is not enough time in the day to attend a party for every miniscule event people want to celebrate so over the top.
The gender reveal. I just can’t.
Next thing you know we’ll be invited to conception celebrations!
eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeewwwwwww. So disturbed.
This is the exact same reaction I had to that video making the rounds of the dad who gives the groom a speech at the altar before handing over his daughter… the “Me and God worked hard on her, don’t screw it up” speech. Totally taking a day that isn’t about him and upstaging what it should be about. Ugh!
I somehow missed that one – thank goodness.
Father/Daughter, Mother/Son dances at weddings are creepy. Just plain creepy.
And, Em, be glad you missed the don’t screw it UP video.
I have to disagree here. I didn’t see anything inappropriate about this video at all. Times have changed and traditional has slowly disappeared. He wanted this moment with his mom and he chose to do it like this. Why judge him/them for it? I’m sure the bride knew something was going to happen and she approved. And why does everything have to be about the bride, the bride being given away by her dad and the daughter and father dance? I thought a wedding was just as much for the groom as it is for the bride.
I agree with you that the wedding is as much about the groom as it is the bride. However, this little stunt didn’t focus on the bride and groom. It turned all the attention to the groom and his mommy. I’m not saying the bride should have all the attention. The groom should be in the spotlight as well! But his mother shouldn’t.
You also said the bride probably knew in advance and that’s entirely possible (I hope she did). My fiance happened to check his email on his phone last night when we were cuddling on the couch together. Because we were sitting so close together, I could see the screen. His mom emailed him yesterday to suggest the two of them plan a big choreographed mother-son dance…which was supposed to be a secret until the reception. She wasn’t going to tell me or ask my opinion. The fact that she was hiding it from me made it seem like she wanted to upstage me.