These Dreams Go On

For years and years, I have had a recurring dream. I guess you could call it a nightmare, because it’s emotionally upsetting, but it’s not filled with zombies or monsters or decapitation.

It’s about not finishing college.

I graduated from college a semester early. I tested out of nine credits, and took six in summer school, and – voila! – early graduation. This was especially exciting to me because Bobby and I were engaged and I really wanted to get married. But I wasn’t going to get married until I got my degree. So, graduating early allowed us to get married a few months earlier. It also saved my parents a bunch of money, and allowed me to take out less student loans. Yippeee!

And of course, opened the door for my subconscious to forever torture me with dreams about not finishing college.

In some of the dreams, I can’t find a particular class. It’s the day of the final and I realize I haven’t been to class all semester. I dash all over campus trying to find a textbook. I spend the dream searching, searching, running, never finding.

In some of them, I can’t find my school mail box at the campus post office, or CPO (read: see-po) as we called it. And of course, in said mailbox is critical info I need to graduate.

This dream I had last night was even weirder and more elaborate. It involved going to church at said college…and church was held in a swimming pool. And apparently it was taking me a real long time to graduate, because I already had Joshua, and somehow he was attending preschool at said college. And, I couldn’t find either one of our mailboxes at the CPO! Then, I got trapped in a class taught by Casey of Moosh in Indy (who was nowhere near my college, I am pretty sure she was still in high school then, the young whippersnapper) which involved her handing out a lot of Shabby Apple dresses to everyone but me, I got a mismatched top and skirt, and the class went over and I was late to pick Joshua up from his college-preschool and I had to leave Casey’s class early which prevented me from…you guessed it…graduating. (Dangit Casey! Cut a girl a BREAK!)

So.

(Quick congrats to Casey Mullins for making my my recurring nightmare!)

I didn’t sleep very well and woke up emotionally distressed. I hate it how dreams feel so real. My emotions were wrenched, my blood pressure high.

Maybe I should dig my diploma out of whatever box it’s buried in and sleep with it under my pillow?

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18 Replies to “These Dreams Go On”

  1. I have these same types of dreams. I thought I was strange until I recently discovered that at least a half dozen of my college friends also suffer from the same nightmares. I particularly hate the ones where I forget to study or miss an exam and the one where I can never get into my mailbox. In fact, I just had the mailbox one last night. AAAGH! (by the way, it’s been 15 years and although they may be less frequent, I still have them! )

  2. This is so funny because I often have a similar dream! Mine is about highschool and it is the first day of the year and I spend the whole dream trying to find my locker. I’m missing classes because I can’t find my locker that have my text books in it (how my text books were already in my locker is a mystery!). I wake up all stressed out. I have this dream every couple months and I graduated from highschool 13yrs ago! I wonder what it means?

  3. My mom, husband and I were just talking the other night about how we all have variations of this dream. Mine usually involves trying to find my class schedule because I don’t know if I’ve been to any classes yet or not. And have I done the homework? I don’t know! It’s all very stressful.

    In high school I was always afraid of having this one particularly strict teacher and in my dreams I would discover that I was supposed to be in his class, show up late of course, and then get in lots of trouble. Being that I was a perfect angel in high school this was VERY stressful!

  4. So funny! I have nearly the same dream. Except I’m due in math class and can’t remember where it is, or haven’t been doing my homework all semester….or can’t remember my schedule, which is locked inside my CPO box, which I either can’t find OR can’t remember the combination too….or it’s chapel and I forgot where my seat is. Good grief! And really, it was a GREAT four years, you’d just never know it from my subconcious.

  5. Maybe it means you are supposed to go back to school now that you have children and get another degree in fashion!

  6. I was just thinking about how I have variations of this dream too – and then I read the comments! So many people still haunted by school! I always wake up SUPER relieved that it was just a dream. Also, it made me smile to read a CPO shout-out. Sometimes I wonder if current Asburians care about CPO as much as we did (back in the stone ages when email wasn’t quite so prolific. I was at Asbury when you were Jenny!) Yes, my friends/family actually wrote me real letters on a regular basis when I was in college. Amazing.

  7. I have the same type of dreams, but mine are that I fail all my classes that I am taking Right now (which are none) and I can’t graduate. I wake up in cold sweats sometimes and HELLO 1. I have a degree and 2. I am NOT taking classes right now.
    WEIRD!!

  8. I have a similar dream – still, 6+ years after graduation, 4+ years after finishing my masters – I dream I forgot to go to a class all semester, and now I’m going to fail it, but I don’t know where it is or when it meets…

    Glad to know I’m not the only one who wakes up agitated and in a panic over old fears!

  9. A. I’d never make it as a teacher.

    B. I’d never ever hold class in or near a body water. Or at a school that believed in having a body of water. (Me no likey.)

    C. What Heather said about the mismatched clothes. I was trying to force you to be all creative, Project Runway style.

  10. That is SO weird. I had the exact same dream when I was in collage – about going to the final and realizing I hadn’t attended class all semester. How weird is that? It is a really horrible dream, definitely.

  11. I have these dream, mostly going to class only to discover I haven’t gone all semester and there is something due. It’s almost always my last semester and I’ll sometimes think “but wait, I’ve already graduated.” I wonder what google can turn up about this theme in dreams… Also, I heart CPO. Remember the thrill of getting a slip of paper telling you to pick up your package? That was the best.

  12. LOL are you eating before you go to bed? I have weird dreams all the time, because of a blood pressure med I take, now pregnancy dreams take the cake!!

  13. I have some of the same dreams. Mine have gone so far as to be back at high school. I had one last week were I had stopped showing up for class my last semester and failed all my courses. Actually, I have that one a lot.

  14. I still have can’t remember my CPO combination nightmares. It used to happen to me all the time after I came back from Christmas break. And I have the realize I haven’t been to class all semester nightmare, too. Sheesh, Asbury has scarred us seriously. Perhaps we have unresolved college issues (mine probably has more to do with being steps away from finishing my masters but not completing my thesis).

  15. It tickled me to see your post and all the comments validating what has been an ongoing dream for me and my sister and her hubby. In mine, high school graduation is looming and I realize I haven’t attended one of my required classes all year and it will prevent me from graduating. I try as hard as I can to find the teacher to explain but no matter what I do, what halls I take, who I ask for directions, I cannot find the class…of course I wake up BEFORE resolving this! I think it’s our subconscious working out stress…but man, I hear you on the blood pressure!

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